Heartstring From the 2013 Boston Marathon: Even Jesus Wept

Heartstring of my 2013 Boston Marathon account.  Even Jesus Wept

Click the link for the Google Document

https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B9zuw8xsjOVHMC1hVWRWRXdFZ2s/edit?usp=sharing

Crave the Motivation of 2012

Growing one small step at a time has rung my bell this year.  2012 was a year in my life I am truly grateful of having the opportunity, the grace, and patience, strength, and courage, to keep working hard each and every day.  Today is all I have.  Today is a blessing.  I am grateful of those in my life.

This year saw my health turn up and down.  The Chambersburg half marathon saw my fastest 1:22:10 PR to date. 

My spirit was crushed during and after the 116^th Boston Death March. As motivation turned to agonizing reality, spirit crushed I reached to do what I was taught.  I put effort into to other things: my land in PA was one.  I planted 40+ trees, cleared brush and mowed the field.  I stacked the stones, cleared the logs and branches, and stained the shed with Christa.  I’ve tried hard to help others, and ventured out of my comfort zone.  Picking up some others in the pits to help them have been a joy and a gift of life. 

I spent some time with family, visiting my cousins in North Carolina.  What a fun trip.

Church is so filling and rewarding helping out youth and giving back.  Not taking, as I always seemed to know best.  Giving is a grand gift, and a joy.  Blessings flow abundant.

Reaching the Summit of Mount Rainier, the Columbia Crest at 14,410’ above sea level (some 2.7 miles vertical) with Casey on August 31^st was a test of every ounce of strength, mental, physical, spiritual, 4^th dimension; all I could summon.  I loved the challenge.  I hated the pain.  I did it.  I am not sure what it means; maybe a bit stupider, bolder, and tougher – still the crazy I know, yet so much less insane. 

Canada and couch surfing with Christa was new and exciting and something I had never dreamed.  The Pacific Northwest is awe inspiring.

Goooo  O  R  I  O  L  E  S  !!!

Work has prospered.  I have thoroughly enjoyed my job in the past year.  I have found peace and purpose.  Life is a joy.  God wants me to work, and wants me to show up every day.  I have begun to take the Sabbath a bit holier.  No more intentional “work” on Sundays.  It’s very simple J  Simple, and the truth, will set me free.

Why not tackle a 50-miler?  I can do it, just plan the work, and work the plan.  It’s simple, nothing to it: just go run 50 miles, and then I’m done.  Well, Tussey Mountainback USATF National 50-mile Championship yielded me 12^th place overall in my first crack at the race distance.  Maybe I have some more digging to do.  Nostalgic is an understatement of how that felt.  Without emotion; Grey: Blithe.  Just what does it all mean, Bazzle?

Hunting is freaking fun!  Cold, tiring, and also serene and peaceful, this task is so much more fruitful when I am focused.  Two 8-points and one button have been harvested this 2012 year.  What a joy.  What a yummy freezer.

It’s time to get fit again.  Back to the training table Galloway!  Name that tune?  You can’t hotdogs…

My motivators that keep pushing me forward:

·         Serenity Prayer

·         “Always Do What You Want To Do” - Irv Zablocky

·         “In order to succeed, you must know what you are doing, like what you are doing, and believe in what you are doing”  - Bill Rodgers

·         “Laugh Every Day.  Think Every Day.  Move Emotions to Tears Every Day.  Do that every day and you’ll live a full life.”  - Jimmy V

·         “Be Impeccable with your words, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best.”  - The Four Agreements

·         Three things you can never get back – Time – Lost Opportunity – Words Spoken

·         The only thing that stands between a man and what he wants in life is often merely the will to try it and the faith to believe that it’s possible.

·         Great moments are born from great opportunities

·         DEA FAST Alpha, Chad L. Michael.  February 22, 1979 – October 26, 2009.  RIP

·         “I believe that any hero does what they are asked to  do, regardless of the consequences.”  Army Master Sgt., Sean M. Thomas.  33 years young on March 27, 2007.  RIP

       ·         Thoughts, Treasure, Time, Touch

·         “Absolute Honesty, Absolute Purity, Absolute Unselfishness, Absolute Love” – The 4 Absolutes

·         Lord’s Prayer

“And you set goals and work to achieve them, not because the goals are intrinsically important, but because they keep you on task and pushing toward greater excellence.  And in this excellence is joy:  the unparalleled feeling of engaging in a difficult task and having the skill to accomplish it.”  - Jonathan Beverly, Editor-in-Chief, Running Times Magazine

I can’t wait for the joy of the present; the right now; the serenity of now.  What a grand year.  Thank you for being part of it.

Blithe Road Ahead

Typically I’m positive, optimistic, and cheerful; today I’m a negative ion gathering dust on the plastic rod.  I feel beaten.  Knowing I must scrape myself up and push onward I’m trying to look beyond the dull blithe road ahead and find some color in the horizon.  Tomorrow will be bright. 

With just over 6 weeks until Boston, in all aspects the marathon is rapidly approaching.  This is no time to get deflated, lose confidence, and forget about motivation.  Unfortunately, right now, the Debbie Downer storm clouds above my head are pouring. 

Just a few days ago I raced my second fastest 10-mile time ever at Club Challenge.  62:41 over the grueling course at 6:16/mile pace pushed my limits enough to puke repeatedly no longer than 20 seconds after I crossed the line.  But I still had more in me that day.  My legs are just not turning over the way I expect, or hope.  My right leg has a nerve pain that is radiating and leaving my step without power, and occasional numbness.  My gate is suffering, and I’d be fine if that were it. True nerve fatigue is taking its’ grip on me; that illusive mental lapse, mental nerve breakdown, mental fortitude.  I don’t quit.  But sometimes I just feel like, quitting I still might, why do I put up this fight, why do I still…RACE?

The tightrope of marathon training is wobbly right now, and it’s hard to walk, let alone toe across.  I’ve been here before, so my blinders are transparent.  This is not new ground, but blithe vision has gray on grey shades of black & white.   Numb; I wish my leg & foot wasn’t frequently.

After next Saturday’s Chambersburg Half marathon, where I am shooting to PR sub 1:23:40, I’ll be 37 days out from Boston.  That is plenty of time, to muster another strong push, including several workouts and key 24-miler along the Buttonwood to Waterville route, a recovery and ramp up, and final taper period.  I’ve been here before.  Stay on the path. 

Sometimes I need to write it down; let another one know where I’m at.  Marathon training is lonely.  Unlike training for a shorter distance race where you may find yourself in that race 5 or 10 times in a season, it’s stack all your chips, all in, for one day.  All for just a three hour stand.  The stress of that alone is tough.  Put it in perspective, since 2010 began I’ve run about 4,500 miles – yet only 52.4 miles have been during my two road marathons.  That’s a lot of training for two pay outs.  Sure, I’ve run other races in the last two year journey…  But right now it’s all about Boston and the pursuant sub 2:50 effort I train. 

This tuned up Dodge Dart is simply trying to keep focus and drive unbroken. 

Try a little harder and Make Z Proud…  Because the only thing that stands between a man and what he wants in life is often merely the will to try it, and the faith to believe that it’s possible.  Today is day 1 of training.